Roadhouse 2012: Pain Still Don't Hurt

These three links describing a sequel to Patrick Swayze's "Roadhouse" are the funniest stuff I have read in a year. 

http://flint.craigslist.org/wet/3192431130.html

http://flint.craigslist.org/wet/3210111484.html

http://flint.craigslist.org/wet/3237585586.html

"After a couple minutes of Guy Cooler and Captain Karl rappin' about last night's babes through the john door, we hear monster trucks outside. Guy Cooler dives out the window on top of one and starts punchin' the windshield in. Captain Karl grunts out a premie and comes outta the john with a chainsaw, but runs down the stairs instead of divin' out the window. . .'cause he's carryin' a chainsaw."

I could not praise this stuff any higher-- not even if my own son wrote it.  (My hypothetical son, that is.)  My favorite part is that this fantastically well-written material is not in Shouts and Murmurs or McSweeneys or The Onion.  It's in the Flint, Michigan Craigslist.  As Bart Simpson said, "That's called committing to the bit."

The brains behind this is the dude who writes the Karl Welzein Twitter feed.  AKA "Dad Boner."

https://twitter.com/DadBoner

I'm not sure who he is, which is part of what I like about it.